This Is What a Film Director Looks Like

I often think about what it must have been like to be Greg Grant. At 5'7", the former professional basketball player was one of the shortest men playing in the NBA. There’s a famous photo of Grant in front of Manute Bol, towering over him at 7'7". I wonder if Grant, when he introduced himself to people that didn’t know him, was ever met with skeptical looks when he said he was a professional basketball player. Did people dismiss him because of his stature? Did anybody ever laugh in his face, thinking he was joking?

And yet, and yet. As women, we also have a tendency to underestimate other women’s capabilities, often with a simple glance. I’ve been encountering this daily — since leaving school and entering the professional world. Little incidents that seem insignificant by themselves, but if you add them up over more than a decade, they can sting (and hurt your career chances — if people don’t believe you are capable of a job simply because of the way you look). I have hundreds of examples, but a particularly telling episode occurred earlier this week. I attended an event in London; an international crowd of women in film was gathered to celebrate the accomplishments of trailblazers in the industry: women who have paved the way and advocated to promote the work of women directors. There was a wonderful energy in the air, a palpable sense of sisterhood and kinship. My chosen outfit for the event? A sweatshirt I had designed that read, in big bold letters: “This Is What a Film Director Looks Like”. Throughout the evening, attendees smiled at me, giving me a thumbs up when they saw the message on the sweatshirt. Many asked where I got it. But then, time and time again, a startling exchange would occur. Attendee, reading the message on my sweater: “I love your sweater, it’s so cool… So tell me, what do you do in life?” I would point at the words “film director” on the sweatshirt and my interlocutor, embarrassed, would apologize saying “Oh I’m so sorry, of course, I just didn’t think…” This happened a dozen times at an event attended by prominent women in film, who are passionate advocates for the advancement of women in the industry. Good hearted, well meaning people. The cognitive dissonance caught me by surprise, every single time.

I also hope my story will help dispel a toxic myth, related to people in the arts: that unless you are a household name, you earn millions, or you have hundreds of thousand of followers on social media, you must be flailing; you must be struggling financially and your work couldn’t possibly have an impact. This is a lie. An illusion that keeps people in creative professions in a constant state of anxiety and insecurity, always unsatisfied and comparing themselves to the 0.001% that make headline news. There are 100 different ways you can be a professional artist (or an entrepreneur, or [insert profession]). From where I stand, I am truly grateful and satisfied of the impact my work is having. Very modest impact — but significant to me and to those in my circles. I made many choices that go against the current (not being on TV or mainstream streaming services); I have bypassed gatekeepers and a system that I find antiquated and opaque, deciding to be in charge of production and distribution of my projects. It’s a different way of doing things that requires a lot of hard work, but it’s also full of rewards.

I’d like to share with you some of my favorite moments from my life as a filmmaker. Hoping that the next time you see someone like me, you will believe them instantaneously when they tell you what they do. Hoping you will not underestimate what they are capable of.

I was told that sharing photos of Apple HQ premises is strictly forbidden, so I am blurring this one and letting you imagine what it looks like — my Q&A at Apple after the film.

As an aside, I’m not sure what technology they have inside their auditorium (a giant retina cinema screen?) but the picture quality of The Illusionists has never looked better. I was in awe during the screening!

I have decided to retire my “This Is What a Film Director Looks Like” sweatshirt for a bit. I’m having another one made. It will read: “Change maker.”

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